Introduction
You log in.
You create your character.
You pick your class, your look, your name.
And somewhere between customizing eye color and deciding if you want to be a sword-slinging mercenary or a backstabbing rogue, you ask yourself something deeper than you expected:
“Is this still me… or who I wish I was?”
Gamers don’t just play. We inhabit. And when we do, we’re not just escaping reality, we’re shaping it into something we can live with.
Let’s talk about why we gravitate toward certain roles in games… and what it reveals about the versions of ourselves we carry, both hidden and hopeful.
1. We Build the Version of Ourselves We Can Control
In real life, we don’t get stat boosts for kindness.
We can’t charm our way out of a parking ticket.
And we sure as hell can’t reload the last save before a breakup.
But in-game?
We control our choices.
We control our growth.
We decide who we are even if it’s just for a while.
Maybe you’re not confident in life… but in-game, you’re fearless.
Maybe your voice shakes when you speak up IRL… but your RPG character calls out injustice like a seasoned general.
That’s not just escapism. That’s wishcraft.
We’re writing the version of ourselves that we believe could exist if the world let us.
2. We Gravitate Toward Roles That Fill Our Gaps
Ever notice the healer is often the one who’s hurting in real life?
The tank that can take the hit might be the one feeling broken.
The thief who sneaks around? Maybe they’re used to being overlooked.
It’s not random.
It’s subconscious catharsis.
We don’t always play who we are.
Sometimes, we play who we need to be.
3. Choices Let Us Explore Who We Really Are
Games like Mass Effect, Dragon Age, Skyrim, or Fire Emblem put our values under the spotlight.
Do you:
- Spare the enemy or destroy them?
- Romance the sweet one or the one who challenges you?
- Sacrifice yourself or the stranger?
You’re not just making character decisions.
You’re peeling back layers.
And maybe… You surprise yourself.
Maybe you realize you’re braver, more compassionate, or more ruthless than you thought.
Games let us rehearse the most human question:
“Who would I be if I wasn’t afraid?”
4. It’s Not Just Escapism—It’s Self-Discovery
People call games an “escape.”
But sometimes, they’re a mirror.
They reflect the parts of us we don’t always get to express.
The honor we wish we had.
The strength we never got to show.
The love story we’re still hoping for.
It’s not fake. It’s revealed.
And sometimes, that version we roleplay…
is closer to our real self than the one we perform every day.
Final Thoughts
Am I roleplaying as myself?
No.
I’m roleplaying as the me I wish I could be.
The one who speaks with purpose.
The one who draws the sword.
The one who stays calm in battle, helps strangers, protects the innocent, and walks away from what no longer serves them.
And every time I boot up the game, I remember:
That person isn’t just pixels.
That person is in me.
Maybe it’s not about escaping who we are.
Maybe it’s about finding our way back to them.
