For those who watched Saved by the Bell during the 1990s, congratulations! You are old. Not me old, but old. But still not quite as old as Batman ruining the mythos of all other characters he comes across.
As you may know, I have come to not like Batman in modern comics. Frank Miller perked my eyebrows with the weird Reaganomics loving Superman fiasco aka The Dark Knight Returns. In it, Batman decided to unretire from being a hero to build a mech suit and beat Superman to a pulp a few times. And for some reason, Superman forgot he had powers and loved Reagan/Big Government. Superman didn’t get to creating sky graffiti with Wonder Woman this time around.
So what does that have to do with Saved by the Bell? Well, today 90s children love comics and also know Zach Morris is Trash. But did you know Batman is trash?
Not convinced? Here is evidence. In this video, we see Superman: The Animated Series. A world built in refreshing 90s Clinton economy blues and whites. The buildings are tall and sleek. New York Metropolis shows not one bit of pollution. Clean lines everywhere. The cars are sleek. The buildings towering, phal…you get the idea. It’s all gleaming, futuristic yet retro and powerful. A good world for Superman to fight crime, save the day, be underpowered (more on DC doing this in many other treatises) and entertaining comic book fans.
So, let’s ruin it! DC thought what can we do to get that annoying Batman to dirty up Superman’s little utopia here? Have him show up to actually be friends, nay, dare I say “World’s Finest” (just like those cute little chocolate bars scouts used to sell door to door and you can apparently still buy, HELLO). Nah, how about have him show up and seduce Lois Lane into bed and taunt Superman about it, all while Joker also beats up Superman and tortures him with kryptonite statues. Let’s make Lex job to Joker too, since all Batman characters get plot armor by association.
Here you go: Roll video evidence:
So after Batman finished making sure he gave her his own personal rabies shot, time after time after time that week, he left Clark/Superman with his leftovers. Mind the line when Lois finds Bruce is Batman: “When were you going to tell me, the wedding.” To even be able to utter that line means Bruce really knows Lois’ Batcave. So at any rate, Batman makes a grand exit and tells Clark to enjoy seconds and ensures him he may swing in for another meal. Batman Ruins Everything.
